17 WEEKS

Through-out my most recent pregnancy I was certain we were having a boy and there wasn’t a single doubt in my mind.

I guess mother’s intuition starts pretty early. We finally received the pathology and chromosome test results that were done on our almost-foetus. They came back clear. Our wee boy was absolutely perfect - not a single thing wrong with him, just the bad luck of being conceived in a uterus not equipped to take care of him. That overwhelming grief I’m becoming so accustomed to is back in full force, and of course just as I was starting to find some strength to put towards the mountain in front of us. I’ve tried so hard to make sense of it all but even knowing exactly what went wrong I still don’t understand why me, why us. So, what’s next? Surgical reconstruction of my right uterus in an attempt to make it suitable for a pregnancy. And if that doesn’t work.... Anyone wanna lend me theirs for 9 months? I promise to return it in good well used condition.